Apdet sebelum raye..

On Faris’s milestone

Anak teruna saya bakal menyambut ulangtahun 3 bulan on 13 oct nanti, which is on Hari Raya.. but surprisingly, Faris dah boleh meniarap Jumaat lepas, which is on the 84th day.. seingat mama, Aisya dulu 4 bulan baru meniarap.. ringan badan budak ni.. dah pandai gelak & dah tak suka baring.. assyik nak orang pegang berdiri/duduk atas riba sambil main2 dengan dia..

On Aisya

Dia kakak yg kuat jelesnya.. tapi baik hati orangnya.. kesian kadang2, asyik kena marah.. dia tahu dia kena marah, tapi dia macam suka sbb dia nakkan attention.. tapi bila mama sorang tinggal bertiga di rumah, susah mama nak bahagi attention utk 2 org serentak.. tapi bila moodnya baik, dialah yg menolong saya menukar pampers Faris.. kalau minta dia ambilkan pampers, dia akan bawa skali wipes, bedak & minyak telon tanpa disuruh.. kalau diminta tepukkan baby, dia akan main ciku-cak & tiru aksi2 mama supaya baby gelak.. kalau nak mandikan baby, dialah yg akan unbutton baju baby & tanggalkan mittens & socks.. saya & hubby selalu berbincang, cari jalan macamana nak kurangkan memarahi dia, takut dia develop anger/revenge dlm diam.. key factor - kami kena banyak sabar, dan kena involvekan dia dlm apa jua aktiviti dengan Faris.. so that dia rasa bertanggungjawab & tak tercicir.. so far it works!

On Breastfeeding

Alhamdulillah, so far saya masih lagi menyusu, despite the low stock EBM most of the days.. better sikit than nothing kan? Sometimes, susu ada, but saya yg tak sempat nak mengepam.. terlalu letih dgn kerja2 rumah.. bukan hubby tak menolong, tapi hubby pon bz dgn assignment EMBA nya.. sometimes, susu kekeringan bila si anak tak tido seharian & asyik nak nyonyot.. habis kudrat mama, sampaikan masa nak berbuka tu, nak bersuara pon tak mampu.. Semalam lagi parah, tiba2 ni**le kiri saya cracked.. ya Allah, sakitnya.. terkena shower mandi pon rasa nak nangis.. saya sapu Linolin gel Medela and berehat dr menyusu seharian.. tapi saya tetap pam walaupon mildly & susu keluar sikit jer sbb dok susah hati.. lepas tanya akak2 kat ofis, diorang cakap, bagi jer, tahan sakit sket.. so lepas balik kerja smalam, saya kuatkan semangat, bagi juga baby minum seblah yg craked tuh.. Alhamdulillah, Allah maha kaya.. dah baik dah cracked ni**le saya.. it’s all in our mind kan? J Insyallah, masuk rumah baru nanti, saya nak beli peti baru (2 pintu, now 1 pintu) & nak upgrade breastpump kpd double pumping.. niat dah ada, moga2 Allah mudahkan.. oh btw, saya masih berpuasa penuh.. harap2 tak miss langsung..

On Raya preparation

Tahun ni rasa bersemangat nak raya.. walaupon agak sedih sbb tak dapat buat terawih every night.. tahun ni beraya di rumah PIL, sbb masa pantang hari tu dah berkampung lama di Kelantan.. kami mula cuti esok, dan akan pulang ke Lunas Kedah esok pagi.. Selasa depan kami dah balik ke sini, Rabu dah kerja.. saja ambik cuti odd sket dari org lain sbb nak elak jam & hubby ada mid-sem wiken depan (bagi moral support ni).. cuti pon nak kena save sbb insyallah end of the year kami plan nak masuk rumah baru..

untuk raya tahun ni, saya rasa saya shopping sakan la jugak:

Diri sendiri – baju kurung 2 pasang, sandal, handbag (dah lama niat nak beli yg baru.. huhu)
Hubby – 2 helai t-shirt, … (belum habis shopping lagi sbb asyik bz jer dia ni)
Aisya – baju kurung 1 pasang, 2 pasang casual wear, handbag (nak isi duit raya laa katakan)
Faris – tak shopping apa2 sbb semuanya dah beli masa j-card day sebelum dia lahir lagi.. plus pressies yg dia dapat dlm pantang harituh..
Adik bongsu – handbag & brooch
Adik 2nd last – brooch
Adik2 ipar – brooch
Ayah – kasut, seluar 2 helai
Kuih raya – adala 6 jenis + kerepek2 (semua beli.. tak menang tangan nak membuat sendiri.. dah 10 tahun pencen kot.. huhu).. nak bawa balik rumah PIL separuh..
Utk rumah – tak beli apa2 pon (sbb dok plan nak pindah rumah baru la katakan)

Sedih jugak tak dapat balik Kelantan.. kesian kat adik2.. kakak pon balik kampung suami sbb dah lama dia tak balik.. kat Ayah pon kesian gak, sure dok teringat cucu2 dia.. lebih sedih lagi, tak dapat nak ziarah pusara mak.. really miss her especially at this kind of time.. kadang2 air mata bleh mengalir camtu2 jer.. hanya Allah yg memahami hati kami adik beradik yg merindu mak tersayang.. insyallah raya haji kami fly with Airasia ke Kota Bharu.. tiket dah beli sebelum beranak lagi.. hehe

On the new job & transfer request

Saya di tempat baru skarang, gara2 postgrade tempat lama hanya 22.. kat unit baru ni postgrade 23, jaga yg global2 circuit shj.. walaupon speednya hanyalah 128k, bisingnya mak datuk.. tak macam saya jaga domestic dulu, circuit beratus2an sebulan, tapi masih boleh handle.. saya tak suka jaga global circuit saya rasa.. mmg bleh kenal ramai org, partners, TMRO, tapi bila datang masalah yg kita tak dapat selesaikan (masalah foreign end), kita di tengah2 ni tersepit, tercekik pon ada.. tapi tak dapat nak membantu sangat..

Tapi saya mungkin tak lama di unit global ni.. bukan sbb saya tak reti or tak suka.. tapi saya tak berapa minat buat provisioning & coordination rasanya.. cukuplah 3 tahun saya buat coordination, jadi org tengah.. saya nak kerja yg lebih mencabar (kot).. saya rasa, saya jenis yg boleh jer survive di mana2.. cumanya, kalau minat dah kurang, saya hanya akan contribute secukupnya saja, tiada yg lebih.. saya nak cuba buat planning plak.. masa teh tarik Session dgn CEO, Dato' tanya, “apa career plan awak?” saya jawab.. “emp, by chances kot..” tapi skarang saya rasa saya dah ada career plan sikit2.. semoga saya beroleh surat transfer dgn segera.. pengganti dah dapat surat, tapi saya belum.. floatingkah saya??

Banyak plak membebel.. oklah, saya nak ucapkan SELAMAT HARI RAYA EIDUL FITRI untuk kawan2 semua.. mohon MAAF ZAHIR & BATIN.. kepada yg masih ada mak ayah, jgn lupa minta ampun dengan mereka.. cium peluk mereka puas2, jangan malu nak minta maaf.. jangan malu nak ucap sayang kat mereka.. once mereka dah tak ada, siapa lagi yg korang nak call tanya khabar hari2? siapa lagi nak peluk cium korang mcm masa korang budak2 dulu? Siapa nak masakkan lauk2 feveret korang dari kecil? Sudah terbalaskah jasa mereka kat korang sedari kecil? Sudah puaskah korang memberi hadiah2 kepada mereka? Tepuk dada, tanya diri sendiri ok?

menyusu si permata hati..

Alhamdulillah, dah 2 bulan lebih saya berjaya menyusu permata hati kedua saya, Faris.. rasa bangga jugaklah sbb masa lepas bersalinkan dia, saya agak skeptical dgn kemampuan saya.. maklumlah, masa bersalinkan Aisya, saya kurang ilmu, support & kesabaran untuk bf.. baby pon sama, tak sabar.. dengan Faris, dia banyak membantu saya.. dia kuat tido, so saya tak cepat panic.. seminggu lebih susu saya tak cukup sampaikan berat Faris reduced & dia dapat jaundice, tapi Faris tetap sabar.. lepas dah balik Kelantan & mengurut, barulah susu saya banyak..

Cabaran BF..

Saya masuk kerja on 11 sept dan 13 sept kita mula berpuasa.. agak mencabarlah jugak sbb saya baru nak practice mengepam susu di office.. saya taknak terlalu pressure memikirkan ttg stok EBM saya cukup atau tidak sepanjang Ramadhan.. bila ada masa terluang saya pump, banyak atau sikit tu cerita kedua.. setakat ni masih sempat mengepam 2 kali di ofis.. susu saya tak banyak sgt, sekali pam the most saya pernah dapat 6oz.. normally 4-5oz.. lepas 2 kali mengepam, baru dapat around 8-9oz.. so lepas balik kerja or malam saya perlu mengepam sekurang2nya lagi 1 round.. Faris minum 3oz, 5 feedings.. kadang2 jer saya dapat stok 15oz tuh.. stok beku dah lama tak ada sbb kalau weekend, saya fully bf dan terasa terlalu lemah & kering utk mengepam stok.. kalau EBM saya tak cukup, makcik nursery yg menjaga Faris akan berikan formula yg saya bekalkan..

i set my mind to be positive sbb kalau saya keep on susah hati, susu pon makin kurang.. yang penting, i will try my best everyday.. yg bestnye, kat ofis ada geng mengepam, so takdela boring sgt.. jeles jugak kekadang sbb EBM dia lagi banyak berbanding saya.. :) lagi jeles bila tanya2 member2 yg lain, sekali pam diorang bleh dapat 10oz, 12oz dan ada yg sampai 15oz sekali pam! marvellous! lagi satu, saya juga keep on bagi support dekat member2 yg EBMnya lagi kurang drpd saya.. Alhamdulillah, ada yg dah stop mengepam di ofis dah kembali mengepam walaupon hasilnya sedikit.. nasihat saya, yang penting we must keep on pumping & try our best! that's the best gift ever for our child.. :)

dari segi berpuasa & BF, saya rasa stok susu saya tak banyak bezanya dgn before berpuasa.. saya cuba amalkan apa yg disarankan member2 & what i learn thru reading.. minum air banyak2, makan nasi, makan sayur, minum soya & makan kurma.. Alhamdulillah, badan takdela lesu sgt di ofis, sempat lagi pegi shopping di midvalley & sogo.. he he.. tapi on weekend, a bit tiring sbb Faris asyik menyusu.. suka betul dia bila mama tak kerja.. sampaikan bila dah nak iftar, nak bercakap pon saya dah tak larat sbb tekak terasa kering amat.. bila azan jer, airla yg saya capai dulu (tak sempat nak ambik sunat mkn kurma).. harapan saya agar saya dapat BF sekurang2nya 6 bulan.. lagi best kalau dapat mencapai setahun..

semoga Allah makbulkan niat murni saya.. :)

Ada apa utk makan..

Since ramai yg menulis ttg menu2 berbuka & sahur, saya pon nak tulis jugaklah.. takde yg hebat2 pon sbb mmg tak sempat nak masak sgt semenjak ada baby.. tambah pula breastfeed, so, lagi time consuming..

Berbuka..
Selalunya kami beli jer lauk kat pasar Ramadhan.. sejak ada Faris, susah sket nak spend masa kat dapur lama2 sbb biasanya lepas fetch bebudak dari nursery, sampai jer rumah dia nak feeding.. lauk berbuka biasanya sejenis jer - apa2 yg berkuah, kuihsejenis dua, air soya & buah tamar.. kalau beli lauk, nasi saya masak sendiri.. tapi kalau dah lambat sampai rumah, kami tapau jer nasi sebungkus seorang.. either nasi tomato, nasi ayam, nasi kerabu or nasi dagang.. so simple kan? Quite jimat la jugak sbb normally kami spend less than RM10 utk berbuka..

Sahur..
Untuk sahur biasanya saya masak, tapi kalau rasa malas saya bungkus jer lauk dari pasar Ramadhan 2 ketul & panaskan masa sahur, biasanya ayam percikla.. tapi sejak kebelakangan ni Faris selalu kembung sbb saya dah tak pantang sgt makan kuah bersantan, so, starting pagi tadi saya berazam nak masak balik utk sahur, macam awal Ramadhan hari tu.. hubby cakap dia nak lauk2 kering jer time sahur.. so, lagila senang kerja saya.. saya masak either ayam/telur masak kicap dan apa2 yg boleh digoreng kunyit (ayam/udang/etc).. daging saya mmg tak beli sbb hubby pantang makan daging (bp mudah naik).. sayur plak saya mmg dah ready timun utk ulam, hiris bebanyak & taruk dlm peti.. kalau nak masak sayur pon, quite selective sbb saya masih baru lepas pantang, normally bayam atau sawi & carrot jela.. boring betol sbb saya jenis yg suka makan sayur sebenarnya.. kesimpulannya, lauk2 yg saya masak is either goreng kunyit, masak kicap atau masak air/sup.. nak masak pedas2 nanti Faris kembung plak.. syukurla dapat hubby yg tak cerewet.. tu pon dia cakap dah sedap.. he he..

Tips..
Awal2 Ramadhan hari tu saya masak nasi 2 kali, sekali utk berbuka & sekali lagi masa sahur.. tapi sejak kebelakangan ni, saya masak nasi sekali jer utk berbuka & sahur.. then masa sahur just panaskan nasi yg balance tu.. jimat masa & tak perlu basuh periuk.. he he.. lauk plak, lepas dah bersihkan, saya bahagi siap2 portion utk sekali masak & bungkus dlm plastic, senang nak defrost nanti.. sayur pon saya potong siap2.. bawang2 saya kupas banyak2, hiris siap2 (asingkan bawang merah & putih), masuk Tupperware & simpan dlm peti.. all in all, jimatlah sket preparation time utk masak.. biasanya utk sahur saya masak before tidur, sbb takut tak bangun awal or kekadang masa bangun sahur tu si Faris nak feeding.. normally pkl 5.00 baru saya bgn, tak pon 5.10.. hubby plak bangun 5.15, bangun jer terus mengadap nasi.. hu hu..

Memang seronok boleh masak utk hubby, sbb rasa macam dah lama sangat tak masak since sarat pregnant.. hubby pon dah boring makan lauk kedai masa saya berpantang di Kelantan.. walaupon a bit rushing and lauk2 yg dimasak tak seberapa, tapi deep inside rasa puas sangat boleh berbuka & sahur berjemaah dgn hubby.. yg lagi best bila ada orang ketiga yg turut berjemaah - sambil saya makan sahur, sambil breastfeed si Faris.. terasa diri ini sungguh efficient.. he he..

buah hati saya

saya dah pulang ke Puchong, dah seminggu dah.. kononnya dah ada streamyx kat rumah ni, nakla update blog hari2, tapi tak tersempat pon.. dgn 2 org buah hati di rumah, masa terasa singkat sgt.. tak sempat nak kemas rumah pon.. masak pon gitu2 jer utk alas perut saya & Aisya.. emmpp, tak tahu nak type apa pon ni.. still dlm mood pantang sbb perut baby meragam & urat2 saya masih tak betul2 recover..

hari ni saya & hubby hantar Aisya ke nursery.. susah juga nak pujuk si kakak utk ke nursery.. cuti lama sgt, hari2 dok rumah dgn mama.. tapi sbb smlm saya byk kali marah2 dia sbb nakkan attention (haru-biru rumahku... hu hu), so kami decide utk hantar dia ke nursery start hari ni.. actually dia boring dok rumah dgn saya, sbb asyik layan baby.. kakak jeles saya breastfeed & asyik pangku baby jer.. byk kali dia suruh saya letak baby & layan kehendak dia.. nasib baik dia ok masa hantar nursery pagi tadi, walaupon muka sedikit mencuka.. (mama yg sedih.. he he)

sunyi plak rumah takde Aisya.. takde member nak bergaduh.. emmpp, ni saje nak upload gambar buah hati saya.. dulu 2 org, skarang dah 3.. :)

papa & Aisya dlm pool Tok Ayah

Aisya si 'kakak' & Faris

Takziah Zarid & Fahmy..

smlm tiba2 mendapat panggilan drpd Semah.. saya terkejut & tergamam.. sebak.. besarnya dugaan Allah utk Fahmy & Zarid sekeluarga.. kita hanya mampu merancang.. kuasa Allah yg menentukan..

Al-Fatihah untuk anakanda kalian yg tersayang..
Semoga tabah & sabar dgn dugaan ini..

Faris Akasyah

Faris - 1 hari

Faris - 1 minggu (sedikit tan selepas phototherapy session)

Faris - 1 bulan (selepas dibotakkan Papa & Tok Ayah)

Nota kaki: gambar tak berapa clear sbb ambik guna hp..

Key Collection!

Eventually, our house developer called my hubby to set appointment for house key collection.. yeehaaaa.. bestnyer rasa - baby baru.. rumah baru.. hehe.. so, yesterday hubby went for unit inspection & key collection at Denai Alam, seksyen U16 Shah Alam.. tapi hubby tak sempat nak meninjau lebih2 pon sbb dia bz.. so, bermula la episode merancang2 pembelian dan mengorek2 kewangan di mana perlu.. kalau takde 10-20k, rumah kosong jela jawabnya.. and that's a lot of money ok.. mana nak cari ni?

I told hubby tak perlu rushing pon nak masuk rumah baru, biar kawasan tu settle down dulu.. let other people masuk dulu.. biar kedai2 ready dulu.. rumah skarang pon tak kena bayar apa2, sbb insurance cover all the balance payment lepas mak meninggal.. so I guess, lepas raya baru masuk kot.. tak pon hujung tahun before raya haji.. sbb masa tu hubby cuti sekolah.. blehla ambik cuti utk survey2.. kalau nak survey time bulan puasa, tak larat den..

So, harap2 segalanya berjalan lancar untuk kami.. :) doakan kami ok?

Alhamdulillah..

[1]

It was 12th July morning and I need to visit Dr Delaila again since the baby is not out yet.. After the Dr have a regular check-up on me, she was quite worried that baby tak full-engaged lagi walaupon only 3 days left to EDD.. she sent me for an x-ray to check on the pelvic opening.. I started to feel nervous on what to expect.. hubby wasn't by my side at that time.. after 2 hours waiting, i get the x-ray result and returned to Dr Delaila's clinic.. Dr Delaila determined the x-ray result and informed me that it's difficult for me to try normal delivery as the birth canal is 7.8cm while the baby's head is 10cm.. "Caesarean again??" and the Doc said YES.. well, kita hanya merancang, Allah yg menentukan.. during Aisya I went thru emergency C-sect sbb fetal distress, this time plak it's due to CPD (contracted pelvis apa tah..) tapi sbb pelvic opening not wide enough for the baby's head to pass thru, mostly because the canal doesn't open wide during the 1st delivery.. Doc cakap kalau nak cuba normal boleh tapi dia confident that I will go thru the same episode like it was during Aisya if I gave a try.. dengan hati yg sebak, hati ini meredhakan ketentuanNya.. "asalkan mama & baby selamat" I whispered to myself.. My operation was scheduled on Friday afternoon, which is the next day.. I told hubby and he shared the same feelings with me.. then we comfort ourselves, bukan nak anak ramai sangat pon.. 4 paling ramai, enough la tu..

[2]

So, the next morning, we packed everything and went to SJMC.. after checked-in to the ward and have the normal procedures, I was pushed to the OT at 3.00pm.. I had ephidural at about 3.20pm.. the anaesthetist did a great job, i felt only a slight pain on my back.. semuanya rasa cepat sangat.. my sight was covered with a cloth and my lower body started to feel numb.. I can feel Dr Delaila made an incission on my womb and think it's funny because I didn't feel any pain.. after about 5 minutes, I started to feel weird and nervous, why the baby isn't coming out yet? I can still remember it was so easy peasy during Aisya.. everybody kept silent and busy doing their job, unlike during Aisya where they chit chat about Hari Raya.. after a while, 2 people were pushing hard on my tummy to get the baby out.. I was suffocating and told the nurses that I couldn't breath.. I felt so tired and worried and eventually burst into tears.. the anaesthetist came to me and comfort me.. he said that everything's gonna be alright.. Finally the baby is out and I cried upon hearing the baby's cry.. the nurse brought the baby to me so that i could kiss him.. I kissed him and cried.. the nurse brought the baby out to the nursery and that was the last thing I remembered.. I woke up some time later and found myself in the recovery room.. a nurse stood by me and I asked her "where is my baby?" and she said "don't worry, the baby's in the nursery".. I was too tired that I felt asleep before the operation ended..

Alhamdulillah, everything was just fine despite the complication I had in the OT.. so, 13th July 2007 3.52pm, bertambah lagi seorang ahli keluarga En Fairoz.. and we named our baby boy Faris Akasyah.. Faris means yang alim/ahli firasat while Akasyah is the name of Rasulullah's friend.. besides, arwah mak pernah suruh letak nama Akasyah kat nama anak sempena nama my hubby.. Alhamdulillah, dah termakbul niatnya..

Ok, that's enough for now.. will upload Faris's picture and update on my confinement story later on! oh btw, I spoke English while I was in the OT.. bile pk balik, cam klakar plak rasa.. hehe

the updates..

My story..
Last Friday remarked my last day in TSES, SFC.. it has been 3 years working in that unit, that i should say, i contribute a lot! - especially in building up the i-Check system with a few colleagues(hehe.. semah will need to learn about this system in her new unit).. sedihla jugak coz we build the unit from scratch after 1st July 2004 re-org.. dari tak tahu apa job scope sampaila today, that unit has build a name among the CSM and Sales people of TM.. i mastered my knowledge in TM local access and network infrastructure, i learnt DDN NMS, i got to know Sales, CSM and regional technical people.. and many more!

and now, effective 1st July 2007, i am posted to GBAS, SFC (still in SFC), doing provisioning for International circuit.. and provisioning is totally a new thing to me.. this movement is for a better post grade, proposed by my ex-GM.. i just accepted it as i have no other option.. hehe.. but still, i'm waiting for my appeal to follow my GM to his new unit as i am always interested to do planning.. kalau dapat, takpe.. tak dapat, takpe.. just wait and see lah..

Aisya's story..
my Aisya met with an accident at Jusco early last month, ended up her getting some stiches under her chin.. kesian anak mama.. and i must admit, it was my mistake after all :( she was standing inside the Jusco trolley and fell off due to unbalance.. i was not holding the trolley at that time, and that's the biggest mistake i ever made.. hope the scar will fade off as she grows up..

Aisya is so attached to me now, i think because she knows she will lose most of my attention once the baby is out.. sometimes i still have to carry her in my arms shen she started mengamuk usually early in the morning masa nak hantar pergi 'school'.. but most of the time, she is a sweet and helpful girl.. and talkative too.. she's my angel whenever i feel sad or miserable.. kalau nampak mama mcm nangis, nanti dia tanya " nape mama nangis? orang jahat buat ke? " and i will smile and tak jadi nak sedih2.. then she'll say " dah dah.. jangan nangis2 ek.. " while patting my back to comfort me.. so sweet kan? she likes to sing and count and read too.. mama & papa yg tak menyempat nak mengajar banyak2.. nantilah tahun depan insyallah mama hantar pergi school betul2..

Hubby's story..
Tahniah to beloved hubby for the new post - manager post, i must say.. tak kesahla kalau org nak cakap dia tak cukup senior or whatsoever.. i know him and he really deserve it! technical wise, management wise, he had all the skills to be a manager.. and tahniah too for getting TM scholarship and finally register jugak EMBA last weekend.. dah bertahun delay.. takpelah, i let u start first, then i'll proceed with mine.. still undecided yet on what field should i take..

The baby's story..
The baby boy is already 38+weeks inside me and is about anytime to come out! i'm already taking leave starting yesterday, saje nak rehat2 and kemas2 rumah for the new hero.. excited + cuak sbb dah lupe dah camana bersalin aisya dulu.. Aisya dulu overdue.. this time kalau boleh nak cepat2 jer bagi dia keluar.. dah tak larat dah jalan macam penguin.. Alhamdulillah, this time my weight only naik about 12kg, tak macam Aisya dulu, naik 20kg! harap2 lepas bersalin boleh turun dgn senang & cepat.. then barulah boleh bergaya time raya.. hehe

okehlah.. dah lama dah duduk and kaki pon dah bengkak2.. will let u know once the baby is out!

Happy Mother's Day!

A mom is GOD's love in action
She looks with her heart and feels with her eyes
A mom is the bank where her children deposit all their worries and hurt
A mom is the cement that keeps her family together and her love lasts a lifetime

Happy Mother's Day to all moms in the world!

p/s: at last, there's an update.. hahaha

of here and there

I’ve been off from blogging for quite some time. I read others’ blogs, but just remain silent. It’s not because the pregnancy is doing bad. But it’s just me, the lazy bum.

The hate notes..
My body is gaining kilos, my skin easily gets blemish and I have pimples. I need new clothes, so I need lots of money but the bonus is not out yet. TM share price is dropping and I can’t sell my ESOS yet. I told you I need a new hand phone ok? It’s not because my hand phone went kaput, it’s just for the mood setting. (“,)

The happy notes..
Oh btw – the big baby inside me kicks more often and Aisya is behaving very well. =)

The sister-to-be..
Aisya is such an angle nowadays. She loves to imitate what we do or say. She also wants to go to ‘work’ and not to ‘school’. She likes to carry along stuffs like my blusher brush, perfume bottle and lipstick and recently this morning, she brought along 3 teddy bears into the car. She’s such a busy girl these days. Don’t let her found the broom or she’ll sweep every inch of the house and sweats her shirt. She eats and talks a lot. It’s kind of entertainment to us.

I’m tired but..
She still wakes up twice at night for milk. It’s tiring but as a mother, it’s my duty. However, I don’t want to take turn with hubby because I have limited time spent with Aisya everyday. I don’t mind sleeping with Aisya on the floor, in front of the TV if she insisted not to go to bed with us. I don’t mind letting her sleep with her daddy on the bed and leaving me sleeping alone on the floor, though I will get backache the next day. I want her to be a good sister later on, so I must treat her nicely now. I miss her so much and I can’t wait to fetch her from nursery everyday. She’ll be jumping happily when she sees us and she can’t wait to tell us who’s crying at the nursery and what she eats that day. Then she will start singing all the way home. That’s cute.

The plan..
Back in my head, I’m planning to have a maid after we move to our new house maybe end of this year. But hubby seems disagree with me. He has his own reason and I have to respect. After doing some calculation, I think if we really need a maid it will be later on, and not this year. Moving to a new house will cost us a lot, 20k is already a must. Having a maid means we need to add up another 4k. Plus, I think I should try raising 2 kids on my own first and see whether I can handle everything on my own. If I have to surrender, then I’ll shout out. And hubby agrees with me on that. =)

Ok. Need to pen off now. It’s Friday and it’s 5pm already. Chow.

Mengidam

My nausea is deceasing.. and I personally think that’s the best part of pregnancy.. hehe.. kalau time meloya tuh, terasa lamanya nak habis seminggu.. dok ofis pon rasa lemau.. buat kerja pon malas.. balik rumah terus tido.. (hehe.. teruknya aku) tapi now dah bersemangat sket buat kerja.. dah ada mood nak mengemas rumah, and paling best dah boleh masak balik! Kalau idak, buka peti pon rasa nak wek.. apatah lagi nak memasak.. sian hubby & Aisya.. weekend pon makan kat kedai.. (tetiba terasa nak makan nasi dagang kelantan.. Mana nak carik nih? Iskk..)

Back to the title, I’m not actually claiming that I’m mengidam food.. tahla.. masa pregnant Aisya dulu pon takdela mengidam nak makan itu ini.. this time pon sama.. Cuma kekadang teringin tuh, cakap jugala kat hubby.. biasanya teringin nak makan pau goreng inti sambal bilis jer.. ada jual nearby ofis hubby.. sedap gile! dapat 2 biji jadila.. hehe.. kalau tak dibeli, muncung jugakla dlm 1/2jam gitu.. so, it’s not that serious lah I guess..

Lagi satu tengah mengidam nak beli henfon baru.. muahaha.. adakah ini boleh dikatakan mengidam? Atau aku saja mengambil kesempatan tgh pregnant ini untuk berniat sebegitu? Hehehe.. takdelah.. just kidding.. Cuma terasa kepingin nak tukar henfon yg canggih sket, bak kata semah, nak mengikut arus teknologi.. ahaks.. henfonku sekarang ni is a basic henfon.. boleh sms & boleh cakap.. tak pernah kubeli henfon melebih rm400.. this current henfon nih hubby present lepas lahirkan Aisya dulu, sebab henfonku dicuri orang tak berguna masa majlis tahlil arwah mak.. (teruk kan manusia?) so, saje jela nak mereward diri sendiri sempena tahun baru.. (alasan lagi) kire guna duit bonus la eventhough tak sure bleh dapat bonus ke tidak.. nanti kalau berjaya beli daku beritahu ok? Tapi rasanya takdela beli yg canggih2 sgt pon.. nak naik taraf sket jer.. huhu.. semoga daku berjaya.. iyah! iyah!

These are the phones I’m considering, but probably, I’m considering the 1st 2 coz the 3rd one is so pricey (for me) coz it has 3G! See, I told you.. I just need minor upgrading only.. :)

Aisya oh Aisya

She has becoming a lot more sensitive now.. before this, she’ll deaf her ears if we scold her for doing something we dislike.. ataupon buat2 tak faham.. “Aa? Aa? Haa??”..

but now, she’ll tarik muka masam, mulut dicebik and mata mula merah2, ala2 macam nak nagis.. tak tahula sebab nak dapat adik, or memang at this stage is her emotional development stage.. or maybe dia blaja kat nursery from her friends.. lepas buat muka ‘sebek’ tuh, she’ll come to one of us untuk mengadu.. bagus jugak bila jadi macam nih.. we have the chance to explain why we marah2 dia.. she’ll listen and angguk2 as if faham la tu.. bila tanya, nak buat lagi ke tak? She surely say tanak & geleng2 kepala.. adoi.. manja sungguh kakak sorang nih.. we all dah start train dia jadi ‘kakak’ and being a ‘kakak’, kenala sayang adik.. and she’ll kiss my tummy! Tapi kakak ni still carik ‘tim’ (singkatan for puting/pacifier) before tido.. kalau kita cakap ‘kakak tak malu’ pon dia buat donno jer.. isk isk..

Oh, btw, her favourite question now is “mama, ni apa tu?” “ni apa ni?” “sape ni?” and seangkatan dengannya.. hemm.. well, just wait till she can ask “mama, ni nape ni” huhu.. lotih mama nak jawab.. but it’s good if your kid ask a lot of question and full of curiosity, dengan syarat, kita mesti rajin layan & jangan kelentong tau.. yg penting explanation kita senang difahami and make it simple! Love you kakak!

Happy Birthday Mak!

Last week, 18th January was supposed to be Mak’s 55th birthday.. I said ‘supposed’ sebab mak is no more around, physically.. memula plan nak blog on that special day, but I can’t stop my tears from falling down.. sampai bengkak mata kat ofis.. pagi tu, I SMS my family, sedara-mara and not to forget my mom’s closest friends.. mintak diorang bacakan Al-Fatihah buat mak, as her birthday gift.. they replied and made my heart so touched.. I remember Mak said to me, never forget her closest friends, even after she passed away.. she said, that is Sunnah Rasulullah.. and I followed.. everytime jumpa member2 baik mak, they will kiss & hug me the way mak always did.. even a few of them turned up at SJMC when I delivered Aisya, padahal masa tu Mak dah passed away.. (my tears is dwelling by now)

Mak, may Allah bless your soul and place you among those who love Him, those who win His love.. ingat lagi tak Jade bracelet I gave to you on your 52nd birthday? I already passed it to Nurul a few weeks back, because I think she just needs it.. Mak, kalau mak masih ada, I’ll bring you out for a special lunch or dinner, makan kek Secret Recipe, buy you flowers and not to forget expensive gift on your bithday! I love you Mak, I miss you and will always do till my last breath.. Muah2!!

ok.. dah2.. no more sedih2.. kesian kat baby dlm perut ni nanti.. :)

she can swim!

This morning, i went to menara tm medical center for my scheduled check-up.. sampai awal, around 840am and luckily dapat turn no.1.. the lady doc arrived at 9am just as expected.. mind you, the doctor comes only on friday morning, for antenatal/postnatal check-up only.. sbbnya main doctor kat klinik tu laki2.. dia kata lebih selesa kalau ladies check-up dgn ladies, because of aurat sama i think.. the lady doc tu is from UH if i'm not mistaken.. this was my 2nd time doing check-up with her..

I was the 1st to be called by the lady doc.. the doc checked my urine and BP and everything is good.. then the doc asked me to lie down on the bed to do the ultrasound.. actually i'm not used to doing ultrasound at early pregnancy.. time Aisya dulu, masa pergi specialist (28weeks) baru start buat.. so, i don't really know how the baby will look like thru the sonogram.. what i know (from my reading) my baby is only about 3inches long.. still very small kan?

During the test, I can clearly see my baby, her head, her hands and her legs, which are perfectly formed, cuma still very tiny la (except for the head).. and what really catch my eyes was, she can swim, from right to left, up and down, and she do a lot of acrobatic too! hehe.. so cute! Then the doc told me that my placenta (uri) is located at the bottom.. but the doc kata don't worry.. the placenta will soon move upward to the correct location.. She said, from the sonogram, the size of my baby is about 11weeks, which is relevant to my 13weeks+ of pregnancy.. Alhamdulillah, the baby is growing healthily, and also the mom (gain weight 2kg already).. my nausea is easing now, cuma adala sikit2 lagi during maghrib/senja.. well, there's still a loooong way to go! 26weeks more to come! here's what babycenter says..

Memori & impian..

Pejam celik pejam celik dah pon masuk 2007.. pantas sungguh masa berlalu.. as for 2006, banyak suka-duka yg ditempuh.. tapi aku nak ingat yg suka2 jer.. yg duka2 dah tak ingat sangat pon.. :) Alhamdulillah.. Aisya sihat walafiat.. me sihat walafiat.. Cuma hubby jer yg kena demam virus on 1st ramadhan.. 4 malam hubby terlantar kat SJMC.. sedih sangat sambut puasa without him.. But Alhamdulillah there’s nothing serious.. yang penting semua dapat beraya aidilfitri & aidiladha dgn kesihatan yg baik..

Antara peristiwa penting 2006, bln Februari me & hubby beli rumah pertama kami di Shah Alam.. habis dikorek segala saving ASB, jual insurans & withdraw EPF tapi kami puas sbb tak sabar nak ada rumah sendiri yg ada halaman.. boleh buat kolam ikan, boleh tanam pokok banyak2.. isk, tak sabarnya nak masuk rumah baru! Insyallah July 2007 akan siap semuanya.. semalam baru jer gi meninjau, nampak mcm dah 75% siap.. sure berangan2 jer lepas ni.. hehe

Besides, tahun 2006 juga Aisya mula belajar bercakap dgn betul.. dari hari ke hari, vocabnya makin bertambah.. dan sekarang vocabnya dah macam air paip.. tak henti2 cakap mcm orang besar.. yg paling best, dia skang taksub dgn lagu My Heart.. siap hafal part chorus tu.. tgh main sorang2 pon dia akan nyanyi layan blues.. hehe.. lagi satu lagu dia tgh cuba nak hafal is lagu Memang (Pencinta Wanita) ->sama macam Amirul anak Acik Semah =) Alhamdulillah, she has grown up as an active girl.. now dah pandai sedih bila kena marah dgn papa.. sobbing sambil mengalir air mata tapi tak bunyi suara.. hehe.. dah pandai pilih baju colour yg dia nak.. dah pandai ‘melukis’ bila kitorang suruh.. tak kisahla outcomenya jadi apa, yg penting bila suruh lukis apa2 yg dia tahu, dgn sungguh2 dia lukis.. in the end, semuanya nampak sama jer.. size jer lain.. comel.. what we want is her confident in growing up!

Last December, Hubby berjaya dapat scholarship YTM utk UITM EMBA program.. walaupon aku gagal, tapi tetap syukur sbb salah seorang dapat.. anyway, aku dapat berita lagi menggembirakan sbb berjaya conceive 2nd baby setelah mencuba berbulan-bulan.. Alhamdulillah.. syukur tak terhingga.. semoga kandungan ini sihat walafiat hingga ke saat kelahiran.. insyallah, baby ni akan lahir mid-July 2007.. kalau Aisya lahir same birthday month macam papa, adiknya pula akan lahir sama birthday month macam mama.. :)

Last July pula, genap 2 tahun arwah mak meninggalkan kami.. pantasnya masa berlalu.. kadang2 termimpi2 peluk & cium mak.. rindunya pelukan & ciuman tu.. kadang2 aku menangis teresak2 sorang2 bila rindukan mak.. tak siapa akan faham kerinduan hati kami adik-beradik melainkan mereka yg turut mengalaminya.. tapi Alhamdulillah, hidup kami adik-beradik semuanya makin stabil.. Nurul cemerlang dgn pelajarannya di UK.. Saiful bz dengan bisnes sendirinya, Kak Mimi Alhamdulillah dah dapat kerja dan Adik dah berjaya menduduki SPM dgn selamat.. semoga hari2 kami yg mendatang semakin cerah dengan bimbingan dan lindungan dari Allah Ta’ala.. semoga kami sentiasa tabah dgn dugaan2 mendatang..

Tahun 2006 juga kami berjaya menabung lebih banyak berbanding tahun 2005.. walaupon tak banyak mana, tapi asalkan lebih banyak berbanding tahun sebelumnya, itu sudah satu kemajuan.. untuk tahun 2007, kami harap dapat menabung dgn lebih banyak supaya nanti duit rumah dah kena potong, takdela tergezut sangat.. hehe.. lagipon banyak duit nak pakai bila masuk rumah baru nanti.. kami plan nak siapkan interior betul2 baru pindah rumah baru.. maybe end 2007 baru pindah insyallah..

Lepas tu, nak buat lebih banyak amal berbanding tahun lepas.. mungkin tak ada yg grand2, tapi yg penting istiqamah.. nak lebih banyak baca Quran, lebih banyak terawih time bulan puasa nanti, lebih banyak bersedekah, tak kiralah wang ringgit atau barang2 terpakai.. kalau barang2 terpakai tu, daripada dok penuh dalam almari bertahun2 tak sentuh, lebih baikla kita sedekah pada mereka yg kurang berkemampuan.. kat kampung ramai orang susah, sedara-mara pon ramai yg susah.. insyallah akan ditolong apa2 yg termampu..

Lagi satu, aku azam nak luangkan lebih banyak quality time dengan hubby & Aisya.. kalau tak dapat pergi melancong jauh2, dekat2 pon jadila.. yela, dengan perut memboyot, kalau melancong jauh2 pon, takut diri sendiri yg malas nak bergerak nanti.. rugi kan? Tgklah, dalam hati ni, tgh berkira2 nak berjalan ke UK masa Nurul konvo nanti.. tahun 2009/10 kot.. time tu Aisya dah 6 tahun, adiknya 3 tahun.. takdela kena dukung lagi.. senang sket nak berjalan.. so, kenala himpun duit dari skarang.. :)

Ni azam aku yg dah berkarat, tiap2 tahun aku pasang niat nak sambung Masters since 2004.. 2004 siap dapat gi UK lagi dgn tajaan MARA, tapi aku plak mengandungkan Aisya.. and dah tak dapat terbang dah tu.. tapi hikmahnya, aku dapat spend banyak masa dgn arwah mak sebelum beliau pergi.. tahun 2007 ni, hajat dihati nak buat EMBA-UITM.. dah dapat tempat pon since last year tapi atas sbb kewangan, tunda plak ke tahun 2007 ni.. course akan start 1st July.. EDD plak 15th July.. tgh dok berfikir panjang lagi, nak start serentak dgn hubby atau mungkin tangguh lagi.. kalau tangguh lagi, rasanya tak jadi dah ambik MBA.. mungkin nak try Masters in Engin kat UM.. intake Feb 2008.. YTM biasnya tak banyak soal kalau ambik Masters dlm Engin ni sbb ramai sangat apply MBA.. and member2 yg ambik Masters in Engin kat UM semua cakap senang.. tgklah camana.. :) lagi senang, lagi bagus.. yang penting dapat Cert.. hehehe

Huh.. ni azam wajib tiap2 tahun.. nak turunkan berat badan.. hehe.. especially lepas deliver baby nanti.. masa mengandungkan Aisya dulu, my weight naik sampai 20kg.. lepas pantang, berat turun tapi tak turun semuanya.. still ada excess dalam 3-4kg.. harap2 this time dapat control nafsu makan + exercise sket during pregnancy (takleh manjakan sgt badan ni).. so, takdela teruk sangat nak turunkan berat nanti.. huhu.. cuaknya..

This time, nak breastfeed 2nd baby exclusively.. dulu masa lahirkan Aisya, aku tak reti apa2.. dahla caesar.. ingatkan skill breastfeed ni comes naturally.. tapi rupanya tidak.. Aisya taknak minum sbb aku cuba nak bagi lambat sgt.. dia menangis meraung2 sampai aku jadi kesian.. last2 bagi botol.. rupanya nak breastfeed ni kena ada azam & kemahuan yg tinggi.. kena mentally, emotionally & physically prepared.. kesian Aisya.. langsung tak menyusu dia.. kalau ada pon sikit sangat, tu pon yg diperah.. dahla susu tak banyak.. pantang pon sorang2, so takde sapa2 nak ajar or tolong.. no support at all.. syukur Alhamdulillah Aisya sihat walafiat.. she experienced nothing serious so far.. so this time, kena prepare awal2.. harap2 adik Aisya berjaya disusukan.. :) takleh lama, sekejap pon jadila..

Harapan aku, semoga segala impian 2007 akan terlaksana.. semoga Allah permudahkan urusan hidup kami sekeluarga.. semoga kesihatan kami terpelihara.. semoga dilapangkan hati2 kami.. semoga anak2 kami membesar sebagai anak2 yg soleh & solehah.. semoga kami semua bahagia dunia & akhirat.. ameen..